Negatives about your partner to others is a practice that you should stay away from.
You speak badly about your partner but you stay with them. Then you want those around you to support it. Well they look at it as, “Just because you are willing to be mistreated, doesn’t mean I have to be happy about you being mistreated.”
If you look at it from that perspective, it makes a lot of sense.
We have had many people ask that we share insights with people in an effort to get them to leave their partner. We always reply, “They are with the right person for them at this moment.”
Most take a step back and are shocked to hear that.
We understand that when the person recognizes their value, they will make the adjustment without the input from others.
Some people don’t get it. You can share great information with that person (the one being mistreated) and they decide to leave the person that is mistreating them. Then turn around and go back.
Why? They haven’t changed the way they see themselves.
Oh yeah, some don’t go back to the original person that mistreated them, but they find someone new that acts the same way.
So really they did go back.
If you are in a negative situation and you have not made the decision that you are finished with that person, then don’t share with family and friends. They will not understand (and probably shouldn’t) and will not support you staying.
Folks we are not talking about physical or mental abuse. You need to help those you care about. But unfortunately even in these instances, most stay. Why? They don’t know their value. Increase their value and they will take charge and make changes.